|
| |
|
“Your job is being outsourced.” - American Express, 3 months after being hired by them
|
| |
|
|
|
-
I was talking with a friend the other day and he suddenly turned to me and said, "Do you smell that?" My instinctive reaction was to say, "It wasn't me,"…
-
This past Sunday night, I ate dinner at my parent's house. Also in attendance were my sister and her new husband. It was a simple dinner of grilled hot dogs…
-
About twenty years ago, I went to an old soda shop style restaurant in downtown Burlington named Zack's. Their main fare was hot dogs and Cokes in ten ounce glass…
-
My normal breakfast consists of scarfing down a Pop Tart on my way to the office in the morning. Usually because I'm too lazy to fix something healthy to eat.
-
BLT - hold the L and TI have two bosses, a 49-yr old Korean woman and an 86-yr old Jewish man. The woman is the caring, motherly type that treats…
-
Who the hell's he talking to?No, this isn't about a stupid cell phone commercial where a chubby geeky guy walks around saying the stupid catch-phrase into a dummy phone. (Side…
-
The First Knuckle Method.You've seen these people. We all have. The people that engage in some good old fashioned public booger mining.
That's my politically correct term for nose…
-
My parents are getting older. They're in their sixties now. While that's still relatively young by today's standards, they can't do things like they used to.
Every time I…
-
In the American South, we are raised with manners as a matter of breeding. We are taught to hold open doors for complete strangers, help those in need and say…
-
Just like the song says, I'm another day older and deeper in debt. I've always been a fan of birthdays due to that whole "receiving presents" thing. And check this…
|
|
| |
|
Written by Ross Cavins
|
|
Thursday, 06 September 2007 01:21 |
|
It's the beginning of September and I have already seen three Halloween stores open on the route I take to work. Three stores that sell nothing but Halloween costumes and Halloween accessories. Doesn't this seem a bit much?
I remember back when Woolworth's and K-mart used to set up Halloween sections for shoppers. If you wanted a Batman or Wonder Woman costume, that's where you went. And while you were there, you picked up candy for the ghosts and goblins that would be visiting. Blammo, you were done.
For the longest time, my Mom even made mine and my sister's costumes. I was Dracula the same year my sis was a ballerina. My Mom spent hours sewing our outfits from scratch and I wore that cape for years until it finally gave out. It lasted forever and provided hours and hours of pretend fun for both of us.
 Couple Spreading Halloween Cheer With Child.
But leave it to America to screw up a pagan holiday just as bad as we've screwed up the Christian ones. Everything has become so commercial that it makes me sick.
I understand now when people talk about the good old days. It's not the old days they're really referring to, it's the simpler times they represent. A time before a bloated American government. A time when a family could survive off one income and taxes were below fifteen percent (or non-existent) instead of the thirty to forty percent they are now. A time when four thousand square foot Halloween stores didn't exist.
Don't get me wrong, I love Halloween. As a kid, it was my favorite holiday and arguably still is. I mean, you get to dress up and go around the neighborhood begging for candy. And it is expected!! Well, not now that I'm 36, now I just dress up and go to parties. But the memories ... we all hated the houses that handed out the fruit and dental hygiene and loved the ones that gave out the little candy bars. You remember them too, great times.
But three stand-alone Halloween stores in a small southern town? And these are just the ones I know about, I haven't even been to the mall yet. It's gotten ridiculous, the commercialism in America is out of hand. It almost seems like every store you go in has a Halloween section. Enough is enough. It disgusts me. And don't even get me started on the year-round Christmas stores. What's next, Easter stores? Candy-coated crucifixes? Ugh.
But don't fret, I've figured out a way to combat the plague of the Halloween store. This year, for Halloween, I will not spend a single dollar on a costume. I will simply go as a nudist. It will not be pretty, I assure you, and may actually work against my cause but damn it, someone must take a stand! Of course, October 31 is usually fairly chilly, even in the South, so I will have to wear a disclaimer taped to my chest explaining the effects of cold on the male genitalia.
|
|
| |
 |
|
|
|
|
