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“Your job is being outsourced.” - American Express, 3 months after being hired by them
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I heard someone talking yesterday about how this pastor and his church owned half a city block and had a membership of more than five thousand people. By "Big City"…
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Look out for the newest fitness fad that's sweeping the nation! It's the exercise craze that's got Hollywood stars Matthew McConaughey and Katherine Heigel looking like a million dollars. It's…
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This past week, I took a vacation to Asheville. I don't live there yet but I've planned on moving there after the New Year. So I figured that I should…
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One for every mood.All men eventually experience that first time in the condom aisle. Be it in the local drug store or the 7-11 down the street, we've all had…
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The Fading LPThe world is constantly evolving. It is inevitable; all that is now, will be no more. Traditions are but man's futile attempts to preserve a way of life. …
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I've written about how our nation's spelling acuities have decreased since the advent of the internet. As a people, we spell bad. Real bad. But something that often…
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It's true. The world's spelling acuity, and America's in particular, has suffered immensely due to one major reason. The advent of the Internet.
This new medium has single-handedly opened…
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I was born in America. I was raised in America. I possess a distinctly American belief system. Therefore I'm a Native American by all sense of the term, right? Then…
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For the last 2 Sundays, I've worked on the patio at my new place. Before, it was a dangerous sort of walk from the back door because you had to…
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I was playing Scrabble yesterday and I began to wonder if they televised the Scrabble championships. They have them, you know, because I've read about them. But do they televise…
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Written by Ross Cavins
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Monday, 20 August 2007 02:11 |
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I don't care what anyone says or how many people give me wedgies for this but I think Martha Stewart is hot. Before the email barage begins, have you seen the August 2007 issue of Wired? She's splayed over the front cover, smiling like a million bucks.
 Martha Stewart on the cover of Wired Magazine. Picture as your mom's best friend, the one who's divorced and out catting around looking for younger men at restaurant bars. Can't you see it? Look at her smile! You gotta agree with me on that, even if you disagree on everything else out of principle. She has an electric smile.
And I'll say one thing about the sexual aspect. When it comes to acting out fantasies with her, you really can dress up and play prison guard / inmate! Afterwards, she can show you how to properly organize your life into an eight-by-eight room. Think of the tricks you'll learn. Where to hide a shank, how to make a single roll of toilet paper last two weeks and how to make prison hooch from a honey bun, a few oranges and a used Tang container.
Martha Stewart may not be Angelina Jolie or Halle Berry, but in her own librarian MILF kinda way, she's pretty hot. Just make sure you put the salad fork to the left of the dinner fork. Or is it the right? No, pretty sure it's the left.
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