|
| |
|
“You are one funny dude.” - S. Milton, some guy I know
|
| |
|
|
|
-
The other day, a friend asked me for help on their resume and I took a minute to write out a coupla tips on how to fix up your resume. …
-
It's here, it's finally here! I never thought it would come but now it has. Dove Season officially opened in North Carolina on Labor Day!!
Yep, you heard me. …
-
It's every humor writer's goal to write humor that is not only funny, but lasts a lifetime. A good humorist strives to make his experiences in life relatable and enjoyable…
-
Stacy's Mom - Rachel Hunter.MILF. A term I believe was made widely popular by the movie American Pie . It means Mother-I'd-Love-to-Fornicate. The F doesn't really stand for…
-
The First Knuckle Method.You've seen these people. We all have. The people that engage in some good old fashioned public booger mining.
That's my politically correct term for nose…
-
This past week, I had my bi-annual kidney stone attack. Only, this attack was a culmination of a bunch of small attacks that have happened over the last few months. …
-
Men can be defined in more ways than having a penis. We like our sports, whether we're playing them or watching them. We fart in our sleep even if we…
-
The lungs provide our bodies with life-giving oxygen. The heart pumps our blood, the kidneys filter our system, the eyes provide visual representations of the world around us. We've even…
-
You know what's great about a weekday matinee movie? Not only is it cheaper but every once in a while, you can get the whole place to yourself.
It's…
-
I've done it. I ordered the generic version of Rogaine. Minoxidil is the magic ingredient and it promises to restore my masculinity.
I know the negatives. It'll…
|
|
| |
|
Written by Ross Cavins
|
|
Tuesday, 23 October 2007 04:21 |
|
Growing up, I had what I affectionately called "Fat Boy Asthma." Whenever I would play sports, I had trouble breathing. I never experienced an attack for no reason like most asthma sufferers, it only happened when I exerted myself. In fact, that's what the doctor's called it, over-exertion asthma .
I still called it Fat Boy Asthma.
I was chubby during those years before puberty. Of course, now, after puberty we all call it something different. Big-boned. Because our bones have grown, right? Actually, my bones aren't bigger than other people's, just the cushioning on them is.
The descriptor "chubby" was killed sometime during the Political Correctness Movement of the 80s and 90s. The blander, more vanilla terms of "overweight" and "weight-challenged" took its place. "Obese" even came into play but that was reserved for your overly chubby people. We just called them "fat" back then.
 The Infamous Inhaler
Sometimes in the winter months, I'd be playing basketball with the guys and have to stop to drink some hot water. Literally. I'd go inside, run hot tap water in a glass, then drink it down slowly. I later discovered how asthma victims would go in the bathroom, turn the shower on real hot, and inhale the heated mist. Well, so you know, hot water works too.
My Fat Boy Asthma disappeared some time during adolescence, replaced by just plain being out of shape. But not at first, it happened slowly. Over time I didn't bother to bring my inhaler when I played sports. In high school, I could run half-court for thirty minutes and have to stop for a breather. But in college, I could run full court for three hours, then go in and work my labor-type job from 8 to midnight. Not only did I finally get into shape, but the asthma had disappeared.
So to all of you out there with Fat Boy Asthma, or with kids that have it, know that it can get better. With adolescence, not only will it disappear, but it disappears just in time to get dates. Because as we all can agree, it's hard to look cool clutching an inhaler while your face squirms to suck in breaths. Oh, one more thing, and remember this; the asthma may recede, but the fat will stay.
|
|
| |
 |
|
|
|
|
