So I called Time Warner, again.  Using my other ear for the phone, I went through their menu selections, choosing the option for residential service, entering the account phone number, choosing technical support, choosing the option for the cable light on or blinking, etc.  I get a human who asks what I want.  I explained about the fast blinking light and what I thought it meant (no resolvable IP address).  See, I even used techie terms so that I could impress them.  But she told me I wanted Tech Support and put me on hold.  Wait, hadn't I just gone through 10 minutes of pushing keys and stuff to get them?  Methinks their phone system is still screwed up.

I finally got tech support, explained the problem and that I thought the IP needed to be reset on their end.  The guy did that and I reset my router and modem again.  No-go.  Nada.  Still got a blinking cable light.  He transferred me to the local Time Warner and I went through the whole process again with the local place.  Nada.  Nunca.  Not-a-damn-thing happening.  She told me it was too late to have a truck back out that day, there'd be one out between 9:30 and 11:30 the next morning.

So here I sit at 6 in the morning, writing this piece of crap with three more hours to go until there's a remote possibility that I can have internet again.  I estimate that the internet DT's will start in about an hour, no matter how much coffee I have.  I've got Hall & Oates playing on the mp3 player but they can only help so much.  By the time you read this, I will have everything resolved and obviously posted but I totally dread the move to the new office now.  That's tomorrow.  What else can get screwed up now?

Maybe I should hire a few elves to coordinate the move, whatcha think?

P.S.  I'm up and running now, obviously, and you know what the problem was?  They needed to reset my IP on their end.  All the cable guy did when he got here at 11:45 (notice it's not between 9:30 and 11:30?), was test the line, tell me it's dead, call Time Warner and tell them to reset.  Whammo, I have internet.  Maybe I should buy one of those Time Warner shirts the dork in the picture is wearing, I could tell them to reset the modem and because I was wearing the shirt, they'd do it right?  

Hmmm … nah.