porkbreakfast Yesterday, I made the bestest breakfast in the world.  I fried up three sausage patties, six slices of bacon, and two eggs over easy.  Then I added two pieces of toast, slathered in enough butter so that it seeped through to the back of the bread.

In an expert’s opinion, it’s not a real healthy breakfast.

One could even argue that it’s worse for me than my usual Pop Tart ensemble .

I’m not sure which way I’d go on that.  One breakfast is nothing but sugar while one consists of a week’s worth of fat.

Calorie-wise, the Pop Tart breakfast wins.  Hands down.

But I tell you one thing.  I didn’t eat but once more yesterday because the pork and eggs breakfast filled me up good.  So if you count the calories for a full day, the “un-healthier” breakfast may have been better for me.

I can rationalize anything.

Such as, have you noticed pork is a natural laxative?  Not more than thirty minutes after finishing breakfast, I had to go #2.

Not the #2 where you barely have time to read a grocery store ad.  It was the #2 where you have time to read a whole chapter in the book you’re reading.  Not a long chapter, one of those good chapters that last just long enough to make you want to read another chapter.

And not to get graphic, but my #2 was nice and easy.  Relaxing, even.

And you know something else about making bacon and sausage on a weekend morning?  There’s no substitute for that wonderful aroma that lingers in the house all day long.  I ought to invent a pork air freshener.

“Swine Meadow”


In my defense, the toast was whole wheat.